Shattering Expectations & Confronting Imposter Syndrome in Professional Women

Grace Loh

In the realm of professional achievement, women have made significant strides in breaking through the glass ceiling and ascending to leadership roles. Women already face significant challenges in rising to leadership roles, compounded by systemic factors such as gender bias, lack of representation, and stereotypes. These barriers are exacerbated by the prevalence of imposter syndrome, which becomes a damaging self-sabotaging barrier. This pervasive and insidious psychological phenomenon, characterised by feelings of self-doubt and a persistent fear of being exposed as a fraud, can hinder women's confidence, and impede their career advancement. In this article, we delve into the complexities of imposter syndrome, its impact on professional women, and strategies to overcome it.

 

Imposter syndrome, first identified by psychologists Pauline Clance and Suzanne Imes in 1978, is a psychological pattern whereby individuals doubt their accomplishments and have a persistent fear of being exposed as a fraud despite external evidence of competence. Research suggests that imposter syndrome disproportionately affects women, particularly in male-dominated industries and leadership positions. Imposter syndrome displays as a chronic sense of inadequacy despite evidence of competence and success. This phenomenon can manifest in various ways, including feelings of fraudulence, downplaying capabilities and attributing success to luck or external factors rather than their own abilities, and avoiding opportunities for fear of failure or being discovered as an imposter.

 

Imposter syndrome can have profound implications for professional women, hindering their career progression and overall well-being. Women experiencing imposter syndrome may exhibit diminished confidence, experience a perpetuating cycle of self-doubt, refrain from asserting themselves, and develop heightened stress and anxiety in the workplace. Furthermore, imposter syndrome contributes to the perpetuation of gender disparities in leadership and organisational representation, as women may self-select out of opportunities for advancement and leadership roles due to feelings of inadequacy.

 

Strategies for Overcoming Imposter Syndrome

Women must identify and challenge the inner critic that fuels imposter syndrome. Developing self-awareness and reframing negative thoughts can help counteract feelings of inadequacy.

·     Identifying Negative Thought Patterns:

The first step in cognitive restructuring is to develop self-awareness by identifying the specific negative thoughts and beliefs associated with imposter syndrome. This may involve paying attention to recurring self-critical thoughts such as "I'm not good enough," "I don't deserve this success," or "I'm a fraud."

·     Examining Evidence:

Once negative thought patterns are identified, the next step is to critically examine the evidence supporting these beliefs. Women experiencing imposter syndrome are encouraged to challenge the accuracy and validity of their negative self-assessments. They may ask themselves questions such as, "What evidence supports this belief?" or "Is there evidence that contradicts this belief?"

·     Generating Alternative Perspectives:

Cognitive restructuring involves generating alternative, more balanced perspectives, or interpretations of situations. Women are encouraged to consider alternative explanations for their achievements and successes, recognizing their skills, efforts, and contributions. This process helps to counteract the tendency to attribute success to luck or external factors rather than personal competence.

·     Replacing Irrational Thoughts:

After challenging negative beliefs and generating alternative perspectives, women can actively replace irrational thoughts with more realistic and positive ones. This may involve developing affirmations or positive self-statements that affirm their abilities and accomplishments. For example, replacing "I'm a fraud" with "I have worked hard to achieve my success and deserve recognition for my accomplishments" can help shift the focus from self-doubt to self-affirmation.

·     Practice and Repetition:

Cognitive restructuring is a skill that requires practice and repetition. Women experiencing imposter syndrome may benefit from regularly practicing cognitive restructuring techniques, particularly in situations that trigger feelings of self-doubt or inadequacy. Over time, challenging negative thought patterns and replacing them with more adaptive beliefs can lead to lasting changes in self-perception and confidence.

 

Celebrate Achievements

To counter imposter syndrome, it is crucial for women to actively celebrate their achievements and recognise their contributions. Rather than attributing success solely to luck or external factors, women should acknowledge their role in their accomplishments and take pride in their abilities. One effective strategy is to keep a journal of achievements, where women can document their successes, big or small, along with the efforts and skills that contributed to them. This journal serves as a tangible reminder of competence, allowing women to reflect on their capabilities during moments of self-doubt. Moreover, celebrating achievements fosters a sense of accomplishment and reinforces positive self-perception, helping to counteract the negative beliefs perpetuated by imposter syndrome. By consciously acknowledging and celebrating their successes, women can cultivate a greater sense of self-worth and confidence, ultimately empowering them to overcome imposter syndrome and thrive in their professional endeavours.

 

Cultivate a Supportive Network

Building a supportive network of mentors, peers, and allies is an invaluable strategy for countering imposter syndrome among professional women. By surrounding themselves with individuals who provide validation and perspective, women can combat the feelings of self-doubt and inadequacy that often accompany imposter syndrome. Mentors, in particular, offer guidance, wisdom, and encouragement based on their own experiences navigating similar challenges in their careers. They can provide valuable insights and advice, helping women to gain clarity and confidence in their abilities. Peers who understand and empathise with imposter syndrome can offer reassurance and solidarity, creating a sense of belonging and normalising the experiences of self-doubt. Allies within the workplace can advocate for women's achievements and contributions, affirming their value and potential. By connecting with supportive individuals who understand the nuances of imposter syndrome, women can receive the encouragement and validation they need to overcome self-limiting beliefs and realise their full potential. This network not only provides emotional support but also offers practical guidance and perspective, empowering women to navigate challenges with resilience and confidence.

 

Embrace a Growth Mindset

Adopting a growth mindset is a powerful approach for countering imposter syndrome among professional women. At its core, a growth mindset entails believing that abilities and intelligence can be developed through dedication and hard work, rather than being fixed traits. By embracing this perspective, women can reframe challenges as opportunities for learning and personal growth, rather than insurmountable obstacles. Instead of interpreting setbacks as evidence of incompetence or failure, women with a growth mindset view them as natural parts of the learning process and opportunities to refine their skills and strategies.

Central to adopting a growth mindset is the recognition that mastery and resilience are cultivated through perseverance and resilience in the face of adversity. Women are encouraged to embrace setbacks as valuable learning experiences that contribute to their overall development and success. Each challenge becomes an opportunity to stretch beyond one's comfort zone, acquire new knowledge, and build resilience in the face of obstacles.

Furthermore, women can cultivate a growth mindset by reframing their interpretation of feedback and criticism. Rather than viewing feedback as a reflection of personal inadequacy, they can see it as constructive input for improvement and development. This mindset shift enables women to approach feedback with openness and curiosity, leveraging it as a tool for growth rather than a source of validation or judgment.

 

 

Skill Development and Mastery

Skill development and mastery play a crucial role in bolstering the confidence and competence of professional women, thereby mitigating feelings of imposter syndrome. Actively seeking opportunities for skill enhancement and mastery allows women to not only broaden their knowledge base but also refine their existing skill set, ultimately leading to improved performance and validation of their capabilities. Engaging in skill development initiatives empowers women to validate their competence through tangible achievements and accomplishments.

By actively pursuing opportunities for learning and growth, women can expand their repertoire of skills and knowledge, equipping themselves with the tools necessary to excel in their respective fields. This proactive approach not only enhances their professional competence but also instils a sense of empowerment and self-assurance. As women acquire new skills and deepen their expertise, they gain a greater sense of mastery over their roles and responsibilities, thereby reducing feelings of inadequacy and self-doubt associated with imposter syndrome.

Furthermore, skill development serves as a tangible form of validation, providing concrete evidence of women's abilities and contributions in the workplace. As women achieve proficiency in new areas or master challenging tasks, they receive external recognition and feedback that reinforces their sense of competence and diminishes imposter feelings. Moreover, honing existing skills allows women to showcase their expertise and make meaningful contributions to their organisations, further solidifying their confidence and sense of belonging.

 

Seek Professional Help

Psychotherapy and counselling offer tailored interventions to counter imposter syndrome, providing a structured framework for addressing underlying beliefs and behaviours contributing to feelings of inadequacy. Unlike self-help strategies, psychotherapy involves working with a trained therapist who can offer personalised guidance and support based on the individual's unique experiences and needs. Through psychotherapy, individuals can explore the root causes of their imposter syndrome, such as childhood experiences, societal pressures, or internalized beliefs, and develop coping strategies to challenge negative thought patterns and build self-confidence. Counselling, on the other hand, typically focuses on providing support and guidance through talk therapy sessions, offering a safe space for individuals to express their thoughts and emotions surrounding imposter syndrome and receive validation and encouragement. By addressing imposter syndrome in a therapeutic setting, individuals can gain insight into their self-perceptions and learn effective strategies for managing and overcoming feelings of inadequacy, ultimately leading to greater self-awareness, resilience, and personal growth.

In addition to psychotherapy and counselling, coaching is another valuable approach for addressing imposter syndrome and fostering personal growth. Coaching differs from therapy in that it typically focuses on goal-setting, skill development, and performance enhancement rather than delving into deep-rooted psychological issues. A coach works collaboratively with the individual to identify specific goals related to overcoming imposter syndrome and develops actionable strategies to achieve them.

Through coaching, individuals with imposter syndrome can receive targeted support and guidance to build confidence, challenge self-limiting beliefs, and develop effective coping mechanisms. Coaches provide accountability, encouragement, and feedback, empowering individuals to take proactive steps towards overcoming imposter syndrome and achieving their professional goals. Coaching sessions often involve techniques such as visualization, goal-setting, and cognitive-behavioural strategies tailored to the individual's unique needs and challenges. Coaches help individuals identify their strengths, recognise their achievements, and reframe negative thinking patterns that contribute to imposter syndrome. By providing a supportive and non-judgmental environment, coaches help individuals navigate through self-doubt and build resilience, ultimately empowering them to thrive in their careers and personal lives.

Imposter syndrome poses a significant barrier to the advancement and fulfillment of professional women. By understanding its manifestations and implementing strategies to overcome it, women can shatter the glass ceiling and thrive in their careers. Through self-awareness, support networks, and a commitment to personal growth, women can confront imposter syndrome head-on and realise their full potential. It's time to break free from the shackles of self-doubt and embrace the limitless possibilities that await beyond the glass ceiling.

By Praveen Kaur July 1, 2025
“Girl, if you have five real friends after 60, you’ve made some good choices.” said this voice full of wisdom. I remember that taxi ride very clearly. At that moment, I chuckled and started counting my “close” friends using my fingers, toes and maybe even a few rounds in. That sentence stuck with me for over 20 years. I knew deep down someday I will have to recollect that moment. Friendship is beautiful. It is also layered, unpredictable and at times, bittersweet. It grows, withers, surprises us, quietly fades away and sometimes comes back in new form. This is especially true as we transition through life, careers, motherhood, healing and reinvention, our social circles shift with us. Who you needed yesterday may not be who you need today. If you’ve ever caught yourself wondering “Where did everyone go?” or “Why do I feel closer to someone I just met than people I’ve known for years?”, you are not alone. You’re just evolving. And evolution rarely leaves your social circle untouched. What Is Friendship, Really? By definition, friendship is “a person with whom one has a bond of mutual affection, typically one exclusive of sexual or family relations.” But let’s be real, that doesn’t capture the heart of it. To me, friendship is… A soul who supports you without judgement. A person who calls you out with love and cheers you on even louder. Someone who holds space for your becoming. So I’ll ask you, what’s your definition of friendship? Take a breath. Feel into it. You might find your answer has changed. That’s not wrong. It is honest. There’s no shame in evolving, only alignment with your present truth. When You Change, So Do Your Friendships This part can feel tender: when your inner world shifts, your outer circle often reflects that. Some friends will rise with you and celebrate your growth. Some surprise you by meeting you right where you are. Some will resist your change. And some will quietly fade. It’s not about fault; it’s about alignment. That friend who used to be your late-night rant partner might not be your 6 AM hike buddy. And the colleague who didn’t really “get you” five years ago? He / She might be your biggest fan now. Change is inevitable. Clinging to what was can hold you back from what’s possible. What Role Does Energy Play in Friendship? In the Energy Leadership™ framework , we recognize 7 levels of energy. Each representing a way of thinking, feeling and showing up in the world. These levels can also show us how we relate to our friends especially when change enters the picture. Let’s explore: ⚫ Level 1: Victim Energy "No one understands me anymore." This is where disconnection and self-doubt live. You may retreat or feel abandoned. Friendships can feel draining when this is the dominant lens. 🔴 Level 2: Conflict Energy "They don’t support me like I support them." Resentments build. You may find yourself judging, comparing or feeling the urge to prove yourself. Friendships become power plays instead of safe spaces. 🟠 Level 3: Coping Energy "It’s fine. I’ll just adjust to keep the peace." This is the friend who avoids conflict and over-accommodates. It looks harmonious on the outside but often sacrifices authenticity for the sake of connection. 🟡 Level 4: Service Energy "How can I support you through your change?" Here, friendships are built on empathy and care. This friend holds space for your becoming, even if it’s different from their own. 🟢 Level 5: Opportunity Energy "What if this shift brings us closer or introduces new aligned people?" There’s curiosity and collaboration here. You start to see that every change in a friendship opens doors for deeper alignment or necessary redirection. 🔵 Level 6: Flow Energy "I trust the right people will rise with me." At this level, friendships feel effortless, expansive and aligned with your highest values. There’s no grasping, just grace. ⚪ Level 7: Oneness Energy "There’s no separation between giving and receiving love." This is pure connection. Friendships here are soul-level, transcending ego or expectation. Rare, but powerful when experienced. So How Do You Navigate Friendship During Change? Transitions will test your relationships but they’ll also reveal your energetic patterns. Here’s how to move forward consciously: ✅ Get curious, not judgmental – Notice how you're showing up (what level of energy), and how others are too. ✅ Honor mismatches without blame – Some friendships fade. That doesn’t mean they failed. It means the alignment shifted. ✅ Invite new energy – Stay open to friends who match where you are now, not just where you’ve been. ✅ Say thank you loudly or silently – To the ones who stayed. To the ones who couldn’t. To yourself. ✅ Be the kind of energy you want to attract – Every friendship is a mirror. What are you reflecting? Final Thought: You’re Allowed to Outgrow People Outgrowing isn’t betrayal. It’s evolution. You’re allowed to choose friendships that nourish the version of you you’re becoming not just the one you have been. Celebrate this evolution. So go ahead, count your friends on fingers, toes, even add a few imaginary rounds. But more importantly, ask yourself: Are these people reflections of the life I want to live? Because that’s the circle worth nurturing.  If you want to explore coaching with Praveen, get in touch with us: info@counselingperspective.com
By Lilian Lee-Cutts July 1, 2025
In the course of our adult lives, friendships can shift, drift, and sometimes rupture. In the face of busy, divergent lives and priorities, this is a very natural process, but can be one that causes us confusion, pain, and a great sense of loss. Romantic relationships tend to have a clear beginning, middle, and end and we have the tools from young adulthood to understand the expected transitions. Friendships, however, tend to be more fluid and evolve over time with no set rules of engagement. In addition, each person will have a different perspective on what the friendship means to them, and so it’s no surprise that many people can find themselves struggling with questions like: Why does it feel harder to make friends? Why do I feel disconnected from people I used to feel close to? Is it worth my making an effort in this friendship when I feel I get so little from it? If you have found yourself asking these questions, you are definitely not alone. As a psychotherapist, I frequently encounter the deep pain that can come with friendship challenges in adulthood. Despite societal norms pointing us towards focusing our efforts on romantic or familial relationships during adulthood, our friendships are equally crucial to our emotional wellbeing. They offer companionship, shared experience, and a vital sense of belonging. And yet, they’re often forgotten about in conversations about our mental health. So let’s explore how we, as adults, can navigate our friendships with greaterawareness, compassion, and intent. How to navigate friendships 1. Reflect on your needs Start by asking yourself: What does friendship mean to me now? What feels nourishing and good? Your needs are most likely very different to what they were five years ago, and it is OK to acknowledge that. 2. Practice clear communication It’s not always easy, but expressing how you feel - whether it’s hurt at being left out or asking for more time together – will improve the quality of your friendships. Choose a moment when you both feel relaxed enough to be receptive. 3. Embrace flexibility As life happens around us, some friends can go quiet for months. Babies, burnout - it’s all very real. Whilst this can be confusing or hurtful, a bit of grace and compassion goes a long way and gives the friendship opportunity to evolve to a place of greater understanding and depth. 4. Make the time Adult friendship isn’t sustained by chance. It’s easy to get wrapped up in life’s demands while time continues passing by. It becomes a necessity to be intentional about making time for your friends. Some ways to do this are by scheduling regular check-ins as you would in work. Dedicate some time out of your busy schedule to call or message a friend as often as you can. 5. Recognise your patterns Whether you realise it or not, the way you respond to friendships has a lot to do with your attachment style. For example, a person with a secure attachment style is capable of forming nurturing friendships and working through any conflicts that may arise. However, those with more insecure attachment styles may find it harder to let go of friendships that are no longer working and will tend to take any perceived hurt personally. Final note We also need to recognise that not all friendships are formed - or maintained - on equal footing. If you’re LGBTQ+, neurodivergent, disabled, or from a minoritised background, your social landscape may look very different. You may have spent years finding your people, or building a chosen family to replace what blood ties could not offer. Those friendships carry a different kind of emotional weight and often, a depth that comes from shared survival. Similarly, if you struggle with anxiety, depression, or trauma, then the energy that goes in to maintaining friendships can feel daunting. You might feel the need to disappear for a while, or struggle to reply to messages. That doesn’t make you a bad friend, it makes you human and in need of a self compassion practice. If you are finding adult friendships difficult, and want to speak to Lili: info@counselingperspective.com 
By Aki Tsukui June 2, 2025
What does it mean to truly know who you are? During Pride Month, we celebrate the beauty of diverse identities and the courage it takes to live authentically. But beyond the labels and roles, there is a deeper essence waiting to be seen—a core self that exists beneath the surface. At Elemental Wellness, we believe that reconnecting with this essence is both a sacred and scientific journey. And breath is the bridge. The Breath: A Portal to the Subconscious Yin Breathwork, rooted in Leonard Orr’s Rebirthing Breathwork, offers a gentle yet profound way to access inner truth: not through thinking, but through feeling and presence. This form of conscious, connected breathing helps shift our awareness from the everyday, thinking mind (conscious) to the deeper, quieter terrain of the subconscious. Why does this matter? Because the subconscious holds the stories, emotional imprints, and beliefs we’ve absorbed, often unconsciously, from culture, family, and lived experience. These inner patterns shape how we see ourselves and how freely we live out our identities. Through slow, circular breath, Yin Breathwork helps bypass habitual thought loops and opens the door to neuroplasticity: the brain’s natural ability to rewire. When we breathe with intention and softness, we create a relaxed yet alert state, similar to light meditation or REM sleep, where old emotional imprints can surface and be gently released. Science Meets Soul: The Nervous System and Breath From a physiological perspective, breath is one of the few automatic functions we can consciously control. When we slow and deepen our breathing, we signal safety to the brain through the vagus nerve, activating the parasympathetic nervous system, our body’s natural state of rest and repair. This matters deeply for identity work. If we've lived in fight-or-flight, bracing against judgment, discrimination, or internalized shame, our nervous system may associate authenticity with risk. But breath offers another way. It teaches the body that it is safe to soften, to open, to be seen. Over time, regular Yin Breathwork can help regulate the nervous system, reduce anxiety, and increase emotional resilience. It becomes a quiet revolution within: an unlearning of fear and a return to inner freedom. Identity: A Living, Breathing Process We often think of identity as something to define or declare. But what if identity is not fixed, but fluid? What if it’s something we remember , layer by layer, breath by breath? In a Yin Breathwork session, there is no need to force answers. We simply lie back and breathe, allowing what wants to emerge to rise. The experience can feel meditative, emotional, or quietly powerful. As tension releases from the body, insight often follows about who we are beneath the roles, the expectations, the old stories. Rather than striving for authenticity, we relax into it . This isn’t a quick fix. It’s a return to the self—a remembering of what has always been there. And in that remembering, healing happens Pride as a Return to Wholeness Whether you're navigating your gender, sexuality, cultural heritage, or your evolving sense of self, Yin Breathwork offers a sanctuary—a space to return to your body and your truth. There’s no performance. No pressure. Just breath. Just presence. Just you. This Pride, instead of stepping out, we invite you to step in. To soften. To listen. To discover who you are beneath the noise gently, fully, and unapologetically. Yin Breathwork isn’t about changing yourself; it’s about remembering who you’ve always been. Join us for a Yin Breathwork session and reconnect with who you truly are. For booking: info@counselingperspective.com